1. How does a penguin get to school ?

By  Icicle !

2. Who is a penguins favourite Aunt ?

Aunt Artica !

3. What shoes do penguins wear on ice ?

Slippers !

4. What swims in the sea and purrs ?

A cat fish !

5. What is a penguins favourite salad ?

Iceberg Lettuce !

6. What do call a penguin without an eye ?

A penguin !

7. How does a penguin know when something is wrong ?

It smells a bit fishy !

8. Make your Penguin last longer !

1. Attach an outboard motor to it and put it in the sea.

2. Post it to yourself at the wrong address, although that may not work if someone there likes penguins.

3. Refuse to eat it until it has learnt algebra.

4. Give a short lesson in signing and dancing and turn it into a Boy band.

5. Tell it a joke in between each mouthful.

6. Open the wrapper by willpower alone.

7. Tell it everything about yourself before you eat it.

8. Release it into the wild.

9. If you find yourself naked in public...

Eat 300 penguins, and then carefully sew the wrappers into a coat.